(or you can copy and paste this: http://www.usynovite.ru/db/)
Really, please do it. It's important that you see with your own eyes. HERE IT IS AGAIN click it.
Now that you've clicked it, move the window over so you can read this blog and look at the page at the same time. See that blue button with the word that starts with the backwards "N"? Click on that. Now you see that green line with the white square that just dropped down? Don't worry about anything in there except the two little "up-down" arrows in the blue square over on the top right. Click that. Then choose "1999" and click the big blue button with the backwards "N" below once again.
You should be looking at 10 faces. Scroll down and look at them for a second. Now close your eyes, and point to one - any one.
Voila!!
Victim number one. Within six years' time, before this child is 18, (s)he will commit suicide. WAIT!! I know you want to close these browser windows because you think I've gone batty. But stay with me for a minute. I'm not crazy, and I'm not making this up - it really is the statistic for this group of kids. One in ten will commit suicide before they are 18 years of age. Don't close out because your stomach is turning as you look at victim number one.
Instead, look at the numbers 1-10 at the top of the page. Click on #2. There are 10 more faces. Look at them for a second. Close your eyes and point. What? You don't have the stomach for it? Neither do I. Let's not point. Instead, let's just click on the numbers. #3….#4….#5….#6….. Go ahead and see how many pages you go through before you come to the end. Don't close it out yet. Just keep it open so you can glance at them while you read this:
You are looking at Russian orphans who were born in 1999. I've given you only the ones born in 1999 - the kids who turned 12 or are turning 12 this year - because it's a smaller group to wrap your head around. In this database, there are thousands of pages of faces. THOUSANDS!! I went through the ones in the Moscow Region alone, and it took me hours. There were about 250-300 pages. For each page, there is another suicide victim-to-be. If truth be told, it's actually higher because the disabled children aren't included in the statistic, but are pictured in the database.
Why are the numbers so high? One word: Hopelessness.
Let's not even talk about the abuse and/or neglect that usually lands a child in an orphanage to begin with. Let's not even talk about the developmental and physical delays due to lack of nutrition, and insufficient connection and nurture in the institutional setting, and all the emotional baggage that comes along with all that, or the lack of sufficient education and preparation for life outside the institution's walls….
Actually, let do talk about it. Let's talk about it because whether we like it or not, whether we're comfortable with it or not, it factors in to the statistics. Hard facts: kids in orphanages are delayed. The more time they spend in institutions, the more they are delayed. They are delayed emotionally, cognitively, and physically. They're usually smaller and more immature than their non-orphaned peers, and many have a lower IQ from the lack of stimulation in the orphanage setting in the early years of development. When they age out of the orphanage at age 16, they are given a duffle bag with a change of clothing, one month's rent for a "dorm" which is more likened to a cement barracks crammed with older orphans, and an ID card stamped "orphan." As if all they carry internally isn't enough to deal with, their unfortunate situation is stamped like a scarlet letter on their identification forever, like a forewarning to anyone who would have anything to do with them. Try getting a job like that! They don't have any family to encourage them, no family to give a guiding word, to point them in the right direction, or to simply CARE what happens to them. They drown in hopelessness. Is it any wonder then, that these are the statistics that face them:
Every 2.2 seconds another orphan (in the world) ages out with no family to belong to
and no place to call home.
In Russia and the Ukraine, studies have shown that 10% – 15% of these children commit suicide before they reach age eighteen.
These studies also show that 60% of the girls become prostitutes and
70% of the boys become hardened criminals
Another Russian study reported that of the 15,000 orphans aging out of state-run institutions every year, 10% committed suicide, 5,000 were unemployed, 6,000were homeless and 3,000 were in prison within three years…
So, count 10 girls, and pull out six of them. The cute little blondie with pigtails, that spunky-looking brunette girl, the one who looks scared, the one who dreams of being a doctor…. they have a fairly dismal future as the sex workers of Russia. Count 10 boys, and pull out seven of them. These are the future population of Russia's prisons.
I mean, really. What do you expect? At age 16, many of these children have the maturity of a child a few years younger, have very little social adaptation skills, are in full-on sensory overload from being suddenly released into the real world, and are in all-out survival mode. It's a recipe for absolute disaster!! But its' their reality; sink or swim. Most sink like rocks.
When we look at their faces, we are captivated. We read their names: Katya, Klara, Kolya, Sasha, Natasha, Tanya, Vladimir, Vladislav, Vanya, Liza, Vera, Anna, Slava… these are the names of our family members, the names of Vlad's childhood friends… Yes, they are children who have been broken, battered, and bruised by their difficult start in life, but they are very much alive and in desperate need of families. In them, we see ourselves. For how do we come to the Father, but broken, battered, bruised, and in desperate need of the healing that His unconditional love can bring? Who can look at these faces, and not be moved? Who can know what their futures hold through no fault of their own, and not say, "Here am I! Send me!"?
We can't. We have finally reached the decision to add another child to our home - and that will be an older child from Russia. "Older child" is lingo for any child who's no longer an infant. Vlad and I both naturally gravitate toward girls who are in the age range of 9-11, but we're open to God's suggestion. :) We are seeing God start us on the adoption journey, and opening doors. Vlad was put on a sort of forced sabbatical this semester, which affords him more time to travel right now and a bit of flexibility, and our renter is moving from our US residence just in time for us to move there temporarily to complete our home study and adoption process (allows us to adopt an older child, and the process is smoother and faster). In only two weeks Vlad is going to Moscow. I may go as well. And just like that, the search for our next child is underway….
There are so many unknowns, and so many questions. What is certain is this:
1) we are adopting
2) we need prayer
3) the child will be Russian
4) we need prayer
5) we need to raise funds
6) we need prayer
There is a girl in Russia who is waiting... for us.
I mean, really. What do you expect? At age 16, many of these children have the maturity of a child a few years younger, have very little social adaptation skills, are in full-on sensory overload from being suddenly released into the real world, and are in all-out survival mode. It's a recipe for absolute disaster!! But its' their reality; sink or swim. Most sink like rocks.
When we look at their faces, we are captivated. We read their names: Katya, Klara, Kolya, Sasha, Natasha, Tanya, Vladimir, Vladislav, Vanya, Liza, Vera, Anna, Slava… these are the names of our family members, the names of Vlad's childhood friends… Yes, they are children who have been broken, battered, and bruised by their difficult start in life, but they are very much alive and in desperate need of families. In them, we see ourselves. For how do we come to the Father, but broken, battered, bruised, and in desperate need of the healing that His unconditional love can bring? Who can look at these faces, and not be moved? Who can know what their futures hold through no fault of their own, and not say, "Here am I! Send me!"?
We can't. We have finally reached the decision to add another child to our home - and that will be an older child from Russia. "Older child" is lingo for any child who's no longer an infant. Vlad and I both naturally gravitate toward girls who are in the age range of 9-11, but we're open to God's suggestion. :) We are seeing God start us on the adoption journey, and opening doors. Vlad was put on a sort of forced sabbatical this semester, which affords him more time to travel right now and a bit of flexibility, and our renter is moving from our US residence just in time for us to move there temporarily to complete our home study and adoption process (allows us to adopt an older child, and the process is smoother and faster). In only two weeks Vlad is going to Moscow. I may go as well. And just like that, the search for our next child is underway….
There are so many unknowns, and so many questions. What is certain is this:
1) we are adopting
2) we need prayer
3) the child will be Russian
4) we need prayer
5) we need to raise funds
6) we need prayer
There is a girl in Russia who is waiting... for us.
